Photo Courtesy of Josh Willink- Pexels
Relationships are an ecosystem in themselves. What works for one relationship might not work for another!
Social media has ruined dating; there’s no doubt in my mind about that. Between the fake holidays ‘celebrating’ your partner or the unrealistic expectations people adopt through inauthentic social media posts, dating has permanently changed.
Most of today’s generation seems to be focused on adhering to a social narrative of what a relationship should look like. In reality, every relationship looks different and should be defined by the two individuals involved in the partnership. Social media culture has completely ruined the expectations of dating. The days of individuality and genuine connection are gone and have been replaced by performativeness.
One of the most ridiculous things to come out of social media’s infringement in relationships has been the hyper-romanticization of gestures. The trend of “bare minimum” or “princess treatment” has taken the dating culture by storm and has created a sense of unnecessary comparison. Everyone has different ways that they love and different ways that they receive love; placing a universal label on every single gesture is plain exhausting and toxic.
Fake holidays are another gripe of mine. There does not need to be a “National Girlfriend Day” or anything similar to that. You should be celebrating your partner everyday and that should not be contingent on an artificial day. These days just cause everyone to post a cute picture of their partner, and while this is nice, it can be done any other day. This also adds pressure on buying gifts when in reality, there is simply no need. Christmas, Valentine’s Day, and birthdays are already three days where gifts are the expectation; there does not need to be any additional days where gifts are expected. If you want to buy your partner a “just because” gift, go ahead and do it!
Furthermore, modern dating culture has caused an increase in micro-cheating and disloyalty. There is no such thing as privacy with the influence social media has had and this has led to everything becoming public. Cheating has become easier, but also more humiliating because of this. Not only is it easier to find ways to cheat through dating apps, social media, and internet access, but it is also more humiliating for partners to find out because usually, social media is privy to the details of why a relationship ended.
Micro-cheating includes many things like watching pornography, being too friendly to the gender you are attracted to, staying in contact with people you once liked, and many more behaviors. This has all been exploited because of social media. Different sides of social media will claim some of these things are normal, while others argue the exact opposite. Regardless, it is hard to find many positive ways that social media has influenced the dating pool.
It also can seem impossible to find people in a natural way or without drama. People rarely approach others in public anymore and everything is left up to dating sites or messaging through popular apps like Snapchat or Instagram. This creates encounters that are not exactly an accurate representation of the other person because everything across social media can be lied about or disguised.
Social media does have some benefits for the dating world, but there are just as many negatives—if not more. However, I do think that social media can be extremely beneficial in healthy relationships when used in the correct way!